The Diary by CiraArana

Chapter 1 - The Parchment

A/N: My first fan-fic ever.

It was a fine day. The sun shone out warmly, and the leaves of the trees filtered its light so that the three travellers walked in half shadow. A soft breeze rustled through the treetops, birds were singing, and the whole atmosphere was of deep peace.

In front of the travellers the small path through the woods opened into a clearing through which a small river crossed. One of the travellers, a small girl, cried out with joy at the sight and literally bounced over to the river, laughing merrily at the sound of the water dancing over the pebbles. The girl was followed by a queer little creature, almost looking like a toad, which carried a staff with two heads at its end.

This creature stumbled over to the girl, grumbling and admonishing her to be careful and not to fall into the river. The girl laughed at the creature, then turned and ran over to a spot of flower, frightening away a whole cloud of butterflies. The toad-creature shook his head, turned to the third traveller and bowed deeply.

This third traveller, a very tall man of extraordinary beauty, looked around him, seemingly untouched from the beauty of the scene. He cast a cold glance at the little creature, then ordered, "We will stay here for the coming night. See to it, Jaken."

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama," bowed the toad obediently and scrambled off fulfil his master's cryptic command.

Sesshomaru watched the girl for a while, then seated himself in the shade of a large tree and closed his eyes.

His thoughts were interrupted by a cry from the little girl.

"Sesshomaru-sama, Sesshomaru-sama, look what Rin found!"

She came running to him, looking all excited, carrying something that seemed to be parchment. She stopped next to him and handed the parchment over to him, staring at it with huge, curious eyes. "What is it, Sesshomaru-sama?"

He examined it closely. Yes, parchment of some kind, strangely stitched together. Not harmful, but strange. And it smelled...

The toad-like creature arrived, glancing at the paper in his lord's hands, chided the girl for disturbing him with such nonsense, and finally sent her away. When there was no contradiction from the lord, the girl went off, pouting.

"Have you ever seen something like this, Jaken?" Sesshomaru asked.

The small demon looked a little bit worried. "Eh... no, Sesshomaru-sama."

"Hm."

"Ehem, is there something special about this paper, Sesshomaru-sama?" Jaken asked tentatively. His lord narrowed his eyes. Jaken gulped. That doesn't look good, he thought.

Sesshomaru slightly raised his head. "Rin," he called to the girl.

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama," chirped the girl in response from the flower patch.

"Where did you find that?"

"Over there, Sesshomaru-sama." Rin pointed to a nearby bush. "It lay under the bush. Please, Rin wants to know what it is."

Ignoring the girl's plea, Sesshomaru turned once more to the examination of the parchment. He regarded the front of it, where there were some letters. Higurashi Kagome. 3-A. Physics they read. The last was crossed out and instead Diary was written.

"That's interesting," Sesshomaru softly said.

"Ah, Sesshomaru-sama? What is it?" Jaken looked up from its business of digging a hole for a small fire.

"Higurashi Kagome," Sesshomaru read slowly. "Is not Kagome the name of that girl travelling with my bastard half-brother?"

Jaken blinked. "Yes, Sesshomaru-sama, you're right! Now that you mention it I remember quite clearly Inu Yasha shouting that name."

"Yes, it is her name and this paper smells of her." Sesshomaru looked around. "This whole place smells of Inu Yasha and his group. They rested here, a week ago."

The tiny demon gazed admiringly at his lord. "Ah, Sesshomaru-sama, your nose is just perfect! After one week you can still smell them! That is–"

"Shut up, Jaken."

"Yes, Sesshomaru-sama. Of course. But, if I may ask–"

"You may not."

"Ah, no, of course not."

There was silence at the clearing. Only some birds sang of the passed day, the girl laughed, and the toady demon moaned under his work. He gathered wood and then lit a fire for the girl, all the while mumbling and cursing her. They went on with the usual evening rite without causing as much as a glance from the demon lord. His cold golden eyes stared into space, betraying nothing of the thoughts that passed behind them.

When his companions finally lied down for sleep, he blinked and looked at the parchment in his hand.

'This belongs to the girl with the miko-powers,' he mused. Then he turned the first paper and looked at the next page, covered with letters in a very feminine hand. 'She wrote this herself? So she can write?' He got curious and started to read, at first with great difficulties but as he went on he got used to her writing and the way she expressed herself and he found himself strangely fascinated by it.

Dear Diary,

You will surely forgive me for using this old notebook. I forgot my lovely pink book with the little lock at home. But I need to talk to you about all the things that happened. And as I am sure I won't do any Physics while I am here, I can easily spare this notebook to a more important matter.

So, Diary was a person she wrote to? Strange, to write something down just to communicate with another person. Probably a human thing. But why then talk of a book with a lock? And what was Physics?

I've been in Sengoku Jidai again for just two days and oh, what has happened! Now I'm sitting in camp, my friends all around me, and I'm ready to tell you everything. Here we go.

Sengoku Jidai? This was a name for an ear. This era? It would fit very well. But why "again"? It sounded as if she had been in another time, which was absolutely impossible ...

Sesshomaru frowned. When he thought about it, he had to admit that his could very well be the case. It would explain a lot. The girl dressed and behaved so very differently from every human woman he had ever met or heard of - not that they were many - that she could very well be from another time. This seemed to indicate that she was a good deal more powerful than she let on. More powerful, incidentally, than any other being he knew, human or even demonic, for he had never heard of any youkai travelling time.

He did not like the thought.

Yesterday morning Inu Yasha went off to see Totosai and to ask him about a trick to make Tessaiga become lighter. You know, ever after Totosai embedded one of Inu Yasha's fangs in the blade to repair it after Goshinki's attack, Inu Yasha hasn't been able to use the sword properly; it was too heavy. But he needs to be able to use it to suppress his demon blood.

I told Inu Yasha what Totosai explained to us the other day: now that his demon blood was woken up once, he will transform every time he loses Tessaiga. And because he will lose it again when he is not able to use it, he wants to make sure he can use it. He was scared of what he had done during his last transformation. So he went off.

Really interesting! This proved many of his own theories and added to what Bokuseno had told him about the nature of Tessaiga.

At midday the rest of us were joined by the sword smith, who told us about Inu Yasha's plans. Obviously the only way to make Tessaiga become lighter was to stab it in the heart of a dragon youkai. This youkai, Ryuukossei was his name I think, was once fought and sealed in defeat by Inu Yasha's father. According to Totosai, Inu Yasha just needed to stab the sleeping youkai.

Ryuukossei! That damned demon that killed his father! But obviously it didn't kill Inu Yasha... Sesshomaru found himself more and more interested in the girl's story.

Knowing Totosai I had a very bad feeling about this. He is nice, considering he's a demon. He's also completely nuts. He reminds me of grandpa sometimes, which is a very scary thought.

My bad feeling only increased when the old demon told us that Inu Yasha was guided to the dragon's location by Myoga. This flea youkai is a complete coward. If there is even the slightest hint of danger, he will run away.

Sesshomaru smiled a little at the wonderful characterisation of the two old demons.

So I suggested following them, and the others agreed. My bad feelings were right: we were greeted by a fleeing Myoga and a horrible sight.

A slight smirk lifted the corners of Sesshomaru's mouth. This was rather amusing.

The demon wasn't sleeping any longer but awake and dangerous. Afterwards, Inu Yasha told us that Naraku had broken the seal. That measly guy Naraku! Hoping to get rid of Inu Yasha this way! But he has always shown that he is more than ready to use others for his purpose.

But the dragon awake and free wasn't the only problem: Inu Yasha had lost Tessaiga and transformed! Totosai immediately wanted to run away, but I couldn't leave. I couldn't leave Inu Yasha alone, facing this danger on his own without help of friends. I told Totosai I'd stay. Well, I actually yelled at him.

And then Inu Yasha surprised us all when he took up Tessaiga, saying he wouldn't fight without his sword. At his words the sword began to pulse. I saw Inu Yasha's surprised face but I could also feel it myself. It pulsed and obviously became lighter. Inu Yasha attacked, but to our horror even the wind scar did no harm to the dragon youkai.

Totosai repeated that he wanted to leave. He said Inu Yasha couldn't win without the Bakuryuuha, Tessaiga's ultimate power (I thought this was the wind scar, huh).

'This Sesshomaru thought that, too. Little devil of a sword smith...'

But Inu Yasha kept fighting and I definitely wanted to stay, as did Sango-chan and Miroku-sama. From Myoga's panicked babbling I gathered that he told Inu Yasha that his father had died from the wounds he received in his fight against Ryuukossei, and that Inu Yasha was now determined to win this fight to surpass his father. Dear me, but that's just Inu Yasha!

'Only to think that this... this filthy half-youkai should be successful where my pure-blood father failed!' Sesshomaru growled in anger.

The fight was pretty one-sided. Inu Yasha was tossed around, and the demon started spitting balls of electricity at him. I became so worried that I resorted to nail-biting.

Sesshomaru wrinkled his nose. What was electricity?

And then there was the big surprise! Just when Totosai pointed out the impossibility of Inu Yasha's success – he did it. He jumped high into the air and swung his sword at seemingly no aim. But instantly the blade caused little whirlwinds – similar to Kagura's – and they smashed through Ryuukossei's body, turning it to dust. Totosai stared at Inu Yasha in complete disbelieve, and Myoga was all stunned silence.

'He succeeded, damn him!!'

Oh, what a picture it was! Inu Yasha, standing there, small whirlwinds at his feet, and his sword over his shoulder. He turned to us and smiled, and oh, how I loved him in this moment!

'Stop babbling about that, girl! No one is interested in your feelings. Inu Yasha. Cursed little half-breed. He humiliated this Sesshomaru once more!'

He would not stand that! He would kill him and prove that this half-blood only succeeded by sheer luck!

Later at camp, Totosai explained to Inu Yasha about this last attack, which was actually the Bakuryuuha. As far as I understood what he said you cut the youki of a youkai with this technique, using Tessaiga's power to turn the youki against its owner.

Sesshomaru's eyes widened minutely. Now, that was interesting. What a pity that the girl could not be more specific about this. His fingers itched to hold Tessaiga. He desired the blade now more than ever. What an amazing power!

'Father! Why did you give it to Inu Yasha?'

Totosai was completely stunned that Inu Yasha did it without knowing the technique at all. Inu Yasha's answer, that he just cut where he thought it would work out, nearly bowled Totosai over.

A menacing growl came from deep in Sesshomaru's throat. Yes, it was all sheer luck. From beginning to end and he would, would end the boy's streak of good luck.

And Inu Yasha just grinned and said, "Hey, I did tell you I needed only time to master Tessaiga." Then he jumped up and demonstrated another achievement of his: using the wind scar at every time he wants! Like a child showing his new toy (a little showing-off, which was immediately punished by Miroku-sama. Children...). Yes, sometimes Inu Yasha reminds me of a child, mostly when he's bickering with Shippo. Two little boys that definitely need a mother!

...

No, that's nothing to make fun about. Shippo lost his mother, just like Inu Yasha lost his when he was a child. It must have been very hard for him... On the other hand: they both do need a mother, or at least someone to love them and care for them. And I am determined to be there for them, to love them and care for them! To be a mother for Shippo and for Inu Yasha... Well, maybe, someday...

Insert sigh here.

'How very touching,' he snarled in his mind.

Hm, I wonder whether Inu Yasha's brother knew about the Bakuryuuha.

'No, this Sesshomaru did not know about it.'

And if not, how he will react when he gets to know? And I am quite sure he will get to know, because if he isn't informed by somebody else before, Inu Yasha will be only too glad to tell him all: that he, the half-demon, did what his father could not do, and that he has now access to all of Tessaiga's power. It would make him only too happy to rub his brother's nose in it...

'Yes that he would do, filthy little brat.'

Sesshomaru felt hatred surge through his body. He trembled from the power of this emotion and fought to keep back a howl of fury and promising revenge. This would be most undignified.

Rather to divert himself from unpleasant musings than out of real interest he went on reading.

Ah, there we are: the second thing I absolutely must tell you. My dreams. They changed. Grew more intensive. Ahh... no, I can't write it down! I blush at the merest thought of it. Oh, oh...

But, you see, this time he didn't stop with just kissing me, caressing my whole body, and whispering those sweet words to me. No. He went further, much further... and I let him do it and rejoiced in it and...

Yes, we made love to each other.

Phew, now it's written down.

Made love to each other? Sesshomaru's nostrils quivered in mixed amusement and disgust. This had to be a human expression. He supposed she wanted to say that she dreamed of mating with someone. Well, it was not difficult to find that someone, was it? He snorted.

I can't believe that I dream about him and me in this way. Or in any way at all! Though, I think, he is everything a girl can dream of: tall; strong; he'd surely protect you from everything, from spiders crawling through your bed to that creep Naraku; handsome... no, that's not true. He isn't handsome. He is beautiful, far more beautiful than any male being should be allowed to be!

I can't believe I wrote that down!!

Sesshomaru was confused. 'Well, if she is in love with this brat, and she said so herself, why those pains about dreaming of mating? She called it making love. Hn, stupid girl. And that way of hers describing the mutt... Bah, silly human.'

But it is true. Whatever I may think of him, he is breathtakingly beautiful. Especially in fight. He moves so gracefully... Looking at him you can easily forget he brings death.

'Whatever I may think of him? Well, just a bit earlier she said she loved him... oh, those humans! Always fickle and inconsistent!'

Yes, death. But he can also bring life with this sword of his.

Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes. What was the girl talking about? It was he, Sesshomaru, who owned Tensaiga!

He shrugged the thought away. Perhaps she simply meant that Tessaiga had saved her life...

Now, hang on, Kagome! Stop blushing, you didn't mean... Oh, drat! See what these dreams have done to me? I can't even mention a perfectly ordinary item without my brain turning it into an innuendo!

He could not suppress a slight smile. 'Interesting association. Swords, hm?'

I blushed furiously just now, and they are all staring at me! Hope they blame it on Inu Yasha. Sometimes it is rather useful that everybody knows I'm in love with him. That way, I manage to avoid questions about...

This is all so very embarrassing.

Sesshomaru frowned. 'How very confusing this is! Is she not sure about her feelings? If everybody knows, why is it embarrassing?'

But I really did mean the real sword, the katana! Not... the other thing. Eep.

Oh, by the way, I can now tell something about...

Okay, stop this line girl! Breathe deeply, and then back to your task!

I'm beginning to feel like I'm a female Miroku, just this one thing on my mind...

Where did I stop? Ah, yes, I started telling about my dreams. But I'm not going into any details, no, I can't. I'm only fifteen, I shouldn't dream like this!

But I do. And have been dreaming of him ever since I met him. I don't know why, I do not want to! I love Inu Yasha, how can I dream about him in this way?

'This human's mind must be in disorder! If she desires the brat - an appalling thought indeed - her dreams are only natural. Perhaps it is a costume with humans from her time not to mix love and desire? But that would be very odd. This Sesshomaru never came across this behaviour before.'

He is, as I said, everything a girl can dream of. Except, of course, in character. But then, in my dreams he never is his usual self. He's not cold and arrogant, but tender and caring, and his eyes are soft, warm, and loving, and his voice so deep and soft like a purr...

Okay, stop this right now, Kagome! Great kami, I'm reacting to a mere memory of a dream!!

I have to stop this, somehow. For a fifteen-year-old schoolgirl it isn't right to dream like this, I shouldn't even know about it! If this were a story I wouldn't be allowed to read it because of 'adult content'.

But unfortunately, one cannot control one's dreams.

His lips twitched. 'She is at least entertaining.'

Well, this is what I wanted to tell you. Not very straight and logical, was I? But you know the effects my dreams have on me; did I ever tell any dream straight and logical? No, I think not. Those dreams, and especially he, they do always confuse me... Okay, right then. I'll finish for this time. Maybe the dreams cease, now that they've reached...

Oh, well, yes, and maybe pigs can fly.

Goodnight, my dear diary.

Sesshomaru laid the parchment down. He stared into the dying fire, listening to the sound of his companions' breath, and thought about what he just read. Damn Inu Yasha. He did what their father had been unable to do. But Tessaiga! So much more powerful than even he knew!

He looked down at the parchment. It had been strange to read what the girl had written. She used such an odd language, and her brain seemed to be seriously addled. Or was this the normal working of a human's mind? Small wonder they were such inferior creatures! But the girl was odd even for human standards. Besides, she had switched the addressee of her account. She began writing to someone called Diary, but later she was quite obviously talking to herself.

It then occurred to him that Diary probably was not a person. No, apparently the girl wrote these things down for herself, most likely not to forget about them. Was the human memory that fallible? But that would contradict his assumption of her being more powerful than it seemed... What a strange girl!

With a shrug, he held the parchment out to the fire to let the flames consume it. It was interesting, sometimes even entertaining, but now he needed neither entertainment nor riddles to solve. He needed to make plans. He had to get hold of Tessaiga.

A strange girl, but an interesting report. Damn Inu Yasha...

Just when he lowered the parchment to the flames something in his mind clicked. He went rigid with shock, his eyes widened, and when the first flame licked at the paper he snatched it back, staring wide-eyed at it when he came to realisation. The girl's mind was not disordered! It made all perfect sense. She had been talking about two different people!

She was not dreaming of his brother. She was dreaming of him!