Ok now, they're completly exaggerating on the ratings. This is not a fucking one. lol I saw the rating and I laughed. I think someones out to get you. Anywhoooo, lets get to buisness. To get your rating up, stay in character. I read the first few paragraphs only and there was ALOT of ooc people. #2 Too many capital letters. Their good at the begining of proper nouns and the beginning of sentences (look at me, sounding like someone who isn't failing their english class), but when you have whole paragraphs and sentences in capital letters, it makes you and your story seem obnoxious and immature. #3, stop putting your oppinion after ever sentence. When I say that i mean like. Kagome got slapped by the furious Inuyasha (OOOoooOOOoohhh Poor baby. I feel soooooo bad for kagome right now, don't you?) and so on. Every now and then (like at the end of every chapter) you can put it. That why its usually called the authors corner, where they put in their oppinions and their silly conversations with the characters.
#4 I wasn't looking at spelling, but check it since the ratings say your spelling sucks.


Okay, now to get people to read your story....
In the summary you use the abreiviated version of Kags name. Its okay to have a character say that when speaking to Kagome, but if you use it anywhere else it makes you seem lazy, and when you have it in your summary thats what everyone sees and thinks of you.



Well, if I find anything else to talk about, I will. : P BUTTTTTTT , you need to know, I don't tell everybody what to write and how, this story just seemed like somthing I would write, so, I guess I would help you, since I KNOW I would need alot.


Sincerly,
Dat Sexii Bl@ck Chika from Tennessee.

o_o Sesshomaru is so nice.. Like.. A baby duck. XD Why is he so nice?

niceee i love how sesshomaru is OOC :)
for the bold and stuff try using > instead of [ ]

Wow! I loved it! Kag finally hit that piece of shit. I'm so proud. And what is Sesshy planning?....anything hentai I hope?

-Dani.

UPDATE SOON!