Chapter One

Betrayal

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He knew it was wrong but he couldn't stop, his lips hovered over hers until they pressed down softly. She stood still and his heart almost broke right there. His hand found the back of her neck and gently tilted her head back; he needed to get a response, even if it was a smack to the face. He just needed to see her feelings for him. He felt it, his own tears as they poured out, colliding with their lips; he forced back a sob. Slowly he opened his eyes and pulled back from her lips, how could love hurt so much?

"Kagome, I love you," a nine year old Sesshomaru mumbled out.

"Sesshomaru, I...have to get home-- thanks for having me over-- tell Inuyasha I'm sorry about him being sick," her heart was beating fast and she felt like a jerk. She wished she could tell him she felt the same about him but she didn't like him like him. He was crying. I feel like an idiot... He said he loved me; he can't love me I'm only eight! Kagome walked out the front door and down the road to the shrine steps, pausing to look back on the Taisho house down the block she then ran up the stairs and straight into her bed room.

Sesshomaru looked at his feet as his tears continued to fall then suddenly his small hands hit the wall in front of him.

"Mother!" he yell cried and he turned from the wall and ran down stairs and into his mothers room. He found her sitting at her vanity, brushing her knee length silver hair. She turned to him in surprise and sadness when she saw his tears; she opened her arms and he ran into her arms and cried in her embrace.

"Mother, I did just as you had said! I told her how I felt and even kissed her like father does to you but she just stood there and then ran home! Oh, momma, what will I do? I had hoped she felt the same but she doesn't!" his tears seeped through his mother's silk blue robe but she just carried him to her bed and laid him down.

"Sesshomaru, my darling," here she paused as if words had failed her and perhaps they had.

"I never expected this to happen, how do you feel?" was that all she could muster? Sesshomaru looked up at her through tear drop after tear drop.

"I want to die," he turned his head away, pulled the sheets over his head and curled into a ball.

"Sesshomaru, I never want to hear you utter those words again, ever! Do you know how I would feel if you died? Think of your father and Inuyasha, he looks up to you so much; though I don't know why, you aren't very nice to him most times," she pulled the sheets from his head, he looked so sad.

"But Momma, only you love me. I want someone to love me as much as you do, maybe even more!"

"You are too young to talk of such love so hush," she looked at him and his eyes welled up with tears.

"Now even you don't love me!" he jumped from the bed and stormed into the hall, out the front door and ran to kagome's house. He stared mournfully at the large amount of stairs. He sighed and began to trek his way to the house. Can't they get rid of these stupid stairs? Finally he reached the top and stopped for breath, he looked up at Kagome's window and saw the blinds down; he made his way over to the front door and rang the door bell.

When Mrs. Higurashi opened the door he quickly asked to see Kagome. She smiled her warm smile and for a moment he felt as though everything would work out fine, until Kagome came down stairs with her Mr. Beary teddy bear in her hands; Mrs. Higurashi left them alone after closing the front door.

Kagome lead him to her couch where she sat at the very edge while he sat in the middle. He felt like crying again, his lips were trembling with fear and the thought of rejection (again). They sat in silence for a few minutes, Kagome clutching her teddy as though he'd ripped it away from her any minute.

"I won't hurt you!" Sesshomaru yelled as his tears slid down his pale cheeks, Kagome refused to look at him.

"I just want a love like what my Momma and Father have," he slid to the left of the couch and sat closer to her.

"I don't love you Sesshomaru. I don't even know what love is! And besides...I think I kind of like someone," she looked up and saw the pain in his golden eyes; now she felt like crying.

"Who," his voice was harsh and barely recognized by Kagome.

"Inuyasha..." Sesshomaru felt dead inside; she liked someone one who was exactly like him, if only less mannered, more extroverted and had thicker hair but that was it! Tears, damn them to hell; he was sick of them already. Crying wasn't for him and neither was love.

"I just wanted to love you and for you to love me, too." He leaned over to her and placed a wet kiss on her cheeks.

"Bye Kagome." He said as he got up and walked to the door. Kagome dropped her teddy and went to hug him.

"Goodbye Sesshomaru. " If only she knew how long that good bye would last. How long his heart break would last and how it would affect her. She watched him walk down the shrine steps. He never looked back but she could still see the tears and the golden eyes that accused her of betrayal.

Sesshomaru walked inside his house and was greeted by the angry face of his father. He sighed and gave Sesshomaru a glance that all but screamed punishment. He walked into the dinning room, where they had their talks, knowing Sesshomaru was following him.

"Where were you?"

"Kagome's," his voice trembled and he felt the sting of tears again.

"You yelled at your mother before running away," Inutashio stated. Sesshomaru knew his dad very well, at least he would like to think so, and right now Inutashio was very mad.

"Father, I meant no disrespect...I told Kagome I loved her but then she ran home and I told momma about it and then she told me I didn't know what love was, I felt like she didn't love me either so I ran to talk to Kagome. Oh, father, I feel so weak!"

"Love sometimes takes everything out of us, that's why it's best to fall in love when you're older."

"Like you and momma?"

"Well, your mother and I weren't always in love. There was a time when we couldn't stand each other, your mother had enough and filed for a divorce. That's when I met Inuyasha's mother, then we had Inuyasha but she died a month after he was born due to complications during his birth. Then your mother and I tried to work things out and we did... Son, love is a two sided feeling," he picked up his son and put him over his shoulder. Sesshomaru cried for the rest of the evening, he even got to miss school the next day.

He spent his day reading books from his book shelf, he even went to check on Inuyasha, if only a bit begrudgingly. He stayed in Inuyasha's room for about half an hour, he sat in the corner on the floor. He watched Inuyasha sleep with envy, someone loved him. He would continue to envy his younger half brother for years to come, eight to be exact.

He would close himself off from others, especially Kagome and Inuyasha, the two people that hurt him the most. Sesshomaru looked at the floor, he was crying again. He wiped his tears away and walked from Inuyasha's room to his own.

"I don't care about her, not any more."

He never saw Inuyasha lift his head up and watch him leave. Though for years to come Inuyasha would wonder what his brother was talking about and would see the image of Sesshomaru's tears hitting the floor in groups of three.

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A/N: I'll need some advice, tell me what you like, don't like. I know Sesshomaru is kind of out of character but he's nine. And about his cursing, a few words he learned courtesy of his dad. Sesshomaru also says to his mother, "you're the only one that loves me." He doesn't see his dad too often or as much as he'd like but he sees his mother and know by being there for him she loves him, in his mind she's the only one that loves him. In other words he's a momma's boy.

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