Unwilling by Calpurnia the Forlorn

Chapter 1

His blood rushed in his ears, drowning all sound. Boiling heat pooled in his loins, demanding sacrifice. For days now the call had been intense, draining all of his strength. A growling moan escaped his parched lips and he bucked, his eyes burning an intense red. He felt hot and cold, sweat lining his brow.

A sweet scent drifted over his lands, enticing him further. Crimson eyes flashed, teeth elongated, and claws curled brutally. A faint memory was drawn by that scent, a girl in a short green kimono. His brother’s human female.

Rage coaxed the flame to builder ever higher; a need to destroy that which called to him. He was off in a split second, seeking the source. Scents came and went, indicating she was alone, but not unguarded. A roar poured out of him as he came into contact with the hanyou.

The younger brother hesitated, recognizing the scent of arousal on the other, before attacking in full. :Kill…: A voice demanded, and the beast rose up and reached forward. :Rival.: He thought. :Brother.: With an earth shattering howl he ripped his brother apart, satisfied that he would not heal for weeks.

Then he turned, the scent of the human now one of fear. She was alone and unprotected, and no doubt had heard his call. She stood by a well, scantily clad as always. :Enticing.: She looked like a meal. Her scent attacked him again.

The girl was fertile, just as he was in musk.

The need became too powerful to deny, and with thought gone he pounced, crushing her to the ground. Her soft cry overpowered the rushing blood and he nipped at her; a possessive snap of teeth. She whimpered and he was aware of words, but could not understand them.

A scent caught his nose and he reared, a roar deafening the girl below him.

He stood on shaky legs in time to catch the Taijiya’s boomerang, which he tossed back into her. The fire cat was next, meeting her own end on the sharp end of a near-by tree branch. She hissed in agony and the light around her flickered and faded.

This left the monk.

A chanted spell caught the youkai in a death grip, forcing him back and away from his prize. He growled dangerously low and slashed outward, determined to break the spell. It held against his strength.

The miko stood on legs gone jelly and ran with the houshi, away from him. A pain-filled, lusty growl issued forth and finally the spell broke. He took to his true form, following the scent of the miko.

They led him on quite a chase, a chase that ended for them almost as soon as it had begun. He leapt on the monk and disemboweled him, ignoring the horrified look on her face.

And then he was turning back, taking a form she would fit to. She turned and ran, terror coloring her admirable scent. She ran until her legs caved beneath her, and then she sobbed for Inuyasha.

He backhanded her when he heard the name, determined that she would acknowledge him as her possessor.

Tears fell in small rivulets down her reddened cheeks. He had hit her too hard, but the rational side was gone, replaced with need.

He tore at her, satisfied when her odd clothing fell away, revealing creamy flesh. She cried out and attempted to cover herself, but he caught hold of her, pulling her arms above her head. He inhaled deeply, distracted by her heady scent before need overcame even that.

He latched onto her amble bosom, taking the time to worship her gifts. She struggled and he pushed her, landing atop her to pin her in place. She tried to reason with him, words laced with fear distracting him from her breasts.

He caught her lips, silencing her pleas. She bit him and he snarled, pushing past her swollen flesh to dominate her wet cavern.

She twisted in his grasp, pushing at his chest in a desperate attempt to get away but he was unmovable. Moments later he had pried her soft thighs apart, dipping his head to take in her scent. She shrieked but it had no effect.

Her small hands pulled at his hair and his tongue snaked out to taste her. She gasped and struggled all the harder, but her desire to leave him was fruitless.

He pushed his heated tongue past her folds, seeking her entrance. She hissed as pleasure unwanted washed through her, bowing backwards with a sharp cry. He mercilessly played her to full arousal, drowning her protests in cries of need.

She soared over the top, her breath hitching in her throat. When she came back to him she sobbed uncontrollably, shame in her eyes. He growled in disapproval and nipped her swollen lips, shredding his own garments and laying betwixt her parted thighs.

A terrified gasp left her parted lips as she felt him press against her, noticing for the first time how large he was. And he meant to use that to…

Her struggles began anew, and he delighted in forcing her submission.

She lay still, sobbing as he lifted upwards and pushed back down, igniting pain and heat in both of them. He ruthlessly slammed into her, claiming her body with one harsh push. She screamed, the sound echoing off the surrounding trees.

He shifted, relishing the feel of her blood on his length, and pulled back, thrusting in before she had time to adjust. Her back bowed in agony and she tried unsuccessfully to clamp her legs shut.

He snarled and forced her further open, dominating her with each powerful thrust. His lips sought hers and he played with her tongue, pulling back only when he felt her heart began to slow. She gasped heavily, sucking in as much air as she could.

A small spark of thought re-entered his mind and he reached between them, drawing newly sought after gasps from her throat.

She arched, this time in pleasure, as he played her like the instrument she was. He caught her breast yet again, and tears fell from mahogany eyes as she encouraged him onward.

Soft hands tangled into silver hair, hips moving upwards instinctively to meet her master’s, for that is what he was now. Teeth sought flesh and he bit, her boiling blood driving him to more carnal instinct.

She cried out in pleasure rather than pain and twisted as her stomach rolled in on itself.

One hand caught her supple breast, and the other, newly regained hand played the bundle of nerves at her core.

She cried out desperately and arched, a wave a pleasure hitting her hard. She held onto him for dear life, orgasm after orgasm driving her vision away. She saw only the burning pools of his eyes, heard only his demanding pants, and felt only his movements.

Finally he pulled his mouth from her skin, satisfied to see the mark blazing there.

With this done he sought his own end, burying himself more firmly inside her. She cried out and her pleasure overtook her again, and with a few more possessive thrusts, he joined her.

It was much later that night that Sesshoumaru regained control of himself. He was mortified to see the human wench beneath him, and further despaired when he saw the mark and felt her torn walls clenching around his still-sheathed member in her sleep.

A moan of pain lit her voice and he bent his head to lap affectionately at her swollen lips. She calmed and fell into a dreamless sleep.

He had no idea how he was going to care for this human girl, this woman-child his beast had claimed. She would hate him, he knew, for his crimes against her. And honestly, he couldn’t blame her.

He pulled back and out of her, his body protesting the movement. He pushed his regrets aside and set to the task of gathering enough cloth from the ground to cover her as best he could. An unfamiliar wash of guilt tugged at him when he saw the blood.

She was covered in it, some from her mark, most from her vaginal breaching. She had been a virgin, and he had taken her most precious gift away.

Amongst demons, this was seen as a heinous crime, and he would have been cast away. As it was, she was a mere mortal, a human, and none would care save him.

She writhed in her sleep, tears streaming down her cheeks as she no doubt relived the experience. It must have been terrifying for her.

He picked her up as gently as he could, mindful of her injuries. If he were anyone else, he would have winced upon sight of the bruise on her face. It was yellowish in color and sported claw marks through the center.

His memory supplied that he had killed her friends, and damn near killed his own kin. She had no one to turn to, and the hanyou, no doubt, would turn away now that she had been claimed, albeit unwillingly, but nevertheless, claimed just the same.

She stirred and he hushed her, wrapping his fluffy Kami no Hogo around her shoulders. She sighed softly and curled to him, seeking warmth. He cursed then, realizing the winter air must surely be bothersome to a human.

He walked swiftly, careful to keep her warm and safe. Before long he had broken into a run, her blue lips and icy flesh putting speed behind his movement. His castle loomed ahead and he was grateful.

Seconds later he was commanding his servants to prepare the Lady’s Rooms, determined that his mate would always have the best. Even still, he knew that it might take years to gain her trust, perhaps even centuries; for when a youkai mated, his mate lived as long as he.

A faint sent caught is nose and he cursed again. The remnants of her own heat cycle were fading, a definite sign that she was breeding. How to tell her that she carried her rapists’ offspring?

A soft moan drifted from her parted lips and he left, pushing aside the feelings of guilt. He was youkai, and he’d be damned before he gave over to emotions.

He headed for his study, where he could think. He had a young human girl, a miko and his brother’s human no less, bound to him as mate. It was a renowned fact that he disliked humans. The other Taiyoukai would find this amusing, no doubt.

Golden eyes narrowed. They would be wise to keep their thoughts quiet.

A thought occurred then, something he should have taken into consideration earlier. The girl was a miko, the living enemy of all youkai. Would her offspring live, or would her power purify them? For a nanosecond he looked concerned, but the look faded before it truly began. With renewed determination, he set to the task of researching this dilemma.

***@***

Kagome stirred, her weary eyes opening to examine the room she lay in. All was dark save the moonlight that crept in through the window. A frown caught her brow and confusion spread through her. Where was she?

Memory opted to return and tears clouded her vision. She shifted, curling into the fetal position and nearly screamed as pain seared through her. Memory replayed the whole scene, and by the end of it she writhed in agony. Sango, Miroku… Were they truly dead? Please let this be a false misconception. Please let that, at least, be a dream.

But reason overwhelmed thought and she cried anew. Surely they were dead, leaving a battered Inuyasha and a frightened Shippou behind.

When the tears had dried and she could shed no more, a quick glance around the room revealed a sickly truth; Sesshoumaru had brought her back with him. The paintings on the walls, the stained glass windows, and the room itself were proof enough.

On the far left of her stood a spacious armoire, filled, she imagined, with the most beautiful yukata around. Above it was a vast painting of the previous Western lady, what could only have been Sesshoumaru’s mother. She had silver hair with a bluish tint, the same facial marking as her son, and deep sakura colored eyes. A small smile graced her lips, and she seemed to be greeting the newcomer.

Kagome shivered, suddenly cold, and turned to further explore.

On the far right stood a beautifully ornamented mirror. Rubies lined the frame, with larger diamonds following them in a circular pattern. She looked pale and frightened in its reflection.

Across from her bed stood the tall, wide door. It appeared to be big enough for Sesshoumaru to march through in his true form. Come to think of it, the entire room was by far large enough to house him in true form. Another shiver rippled through her.

By sitting up, though not without pain, she got a clear view of the window behind the bed. It was broad, taking up nearly the entire wall. Through it she was the vast plains of the Western Lands, sprawling in all directions. It was enough to take her breath away and drain the memories of the previous few hours, if only for a little while.

Again a chill hit her, and with a start, she finally realized she was in what could only be the Lady’s room. Why would Sesshoumaru put her here? Why not just kill her when he was through? No explanation was readily available in her tired mind, and so she settled down, pulling the heavy blankets up to her chin.

The pain was slowly ebbing, but from the feel of things, she needed a bath. A tremor an through her. She doubted Sesshoumaru would grant her a bath. Most likely, he intended to continue raping her. This room was convenient, as it was attached to his own rooms. Fear welled and tears fell.

How would she survive? What had he planned for her?

She shivered in renewed terror as large teardrops soaked her pillow. Soon she was crying outright, stifling her sobs in the sheets.

She was unaware of the door opening, or of the soft sound of padded feet heading her way. She jumped, frightened, when a hand touched her shoulder. She looked up at the person to discover that her eyes were so blurry she couldn’t see. The hand moved in circular, comforting motions, and without thought she leapt forward, holding on for dear life as she cried.

The other rocked her slowly, whispering soothing words. Finally the tars stopped, followed by hiccups. When she could see again, she discovered a young youkai with powder blue hair, violet eyes, and an odd green star on her forehead.

“Who..?” She asked wearily. The other girl laughed softly, ruffling her hair. “I am Yuji, your Lady in Waiting.” She replied softly. Kagome frowned and then comprehension dawned. She spluttered and panic gripped her, but Yuji’s hands soothed away her fears and enticed her into a light doze.

When next Kagome joined the land of the living, Yuji was humming a soft lullaby. She still sat in the same spot, holding the young human to her gently. Kagome pushed away from her, fat tears threatening to fall. She felt like a whore.

Yuji looked concerned and leaned forward, brushing black bangs from a reddened face. “My Lady, I believe you need a bath.” She teased. Kagome could not even attempt a response, so caught up was she in inner turmoil. With a sigh, the youkai stood and lifted the human girl, carrying her to the door and out into the hall.

Kagome held on for dear life, afraid that Sesshoumaru would come at any moment. With a soft frown, Yuji entered the bathing room and carefully set the human inside the smallest one. That was when Kagome realized her state of undress.

Yuji was concerned by the waves of distress coming from her mistress, and attempted to calm her by humming again the lullaby. It seemed to work, for the miko calmed considerably. Yuji thought long and hard, and the only explanation she could come up with for the mortal’s discomfort would be that Sesshoumaru-sama’s beast took control while he was I heat, and had claimed her unwilling.

If this was the case, then she had best explain the situation. It was inevitable that Sesshoumaru-sama would need to be near his mate very soon. The pain of rearing a youkai child, even a half-breed, was said to be extremely hard on a human. It had even killed a few of them, as rumor had it.

The youkai parent had to be present, urging the unborn pup to lie still and quiet. Sesshoumaru would need to be there to keep the pup from killing its mother.

“My Lady, there is something I think you should know.” Kagome turned and regarded the other with a hint of what could have been curiosity. Yuji sighed and began her explanation, determined to get the point across.

At first, Kagome thought she was lying, but the more she explained, the more she saw the truth behind the words. Sesshoumaru had no been himself when he attacked, that was for sure. And he seemed to be almost in pain, as though lost in battle with himself…

Even still, she couldn’t bring herself to simply forgive, nor could she quell the fear of him burning in her heart.

“Perhaps, Mistress, you could try to look past his fault, and get along?” Yuji insisted patiently. Kagome thought long and hard before nodding slowly. If she was indeed pregnant, they would have to get along eventually, anyway, right?

Yuji helped her dry off and carried her back to her room, where she set the girl back on her bed. “He will want to see you soon, I think.” The youkai said softly. “Try not to be frightened. He means you no harm.” Kagome nodded, biting her lip.

“I… I will try.” She intoned, and Yuji smiled at her, planting a soft kiss to her forehead and exiting the room. Kagome pondered her options before drifting off.

***@***

Sesshoumaru glared at his desk, determination marring his usually emotionless eyes. The miko could easily birth her… their pups, but she would need his assistance all the way. The girl would not be able to survive without his constant presence.

Patrolling his lands would have to be left to a trusted soldier, as would the search for Naraku. Kagome could die without his aid, and while that would normally not have mattered, his conscience made it matter. She was in this situation because of him, and he would take care of it.

He rubbed his temples wearily and headed for his rooms. Upon entering, the faint scent of tears and bathwater had him drifting to the door connecting the rooms. She was crying in her sleep, calling out to her mother.

A stab of some emotion compelled him to her side, where he traced her brow with his claw. Immediately she calmed, snuggling further into her blankets. After a few minutes her mahogany eyes opened.

He expected screaming, tears and protests. Instead he got bewilderment, and maybe a little fear. Hesitantly, she sat up and regarded him, an unrecognizable look in her eyes. Then slowly she sat forward, following an instinct provided by the pup, and grabbed hold of him.

Sesshoumaru tensed and felt her start to pull away. She was quickly becoming distressed, and with distress came the light of her purifying energy.

Without thinking he wrapped his arms around her, sitting on the bed so as to pull her into his lap. Instantly she relaxed, and the power faded. She was tense as a bow string, but seemed determined nevertheless.

“Yuji…” She started, surprising them both, “Yuji explained the situation.” Her voice was steady, belying her near terror. “Is it true?” The look in her eyes was so innocent, her childish ways seeking to find an excuse to trust him.

Knowing exactly what Yuji would have said, he nodded sharply. He was rewarded with relief and a dark head falling onto his chest. “I don’t know if I can forgive you, despite everything.” She said quietly. “But I won’t compromise an unborn child because of mistrust, either… I’m willing to try to work through this.”

He relaxed, muscles he hadn’t known were held dropping. She understood, on some instinctual level, the danger associated with her pregnancy. It also seemed that instinct is what kept her from running away.

Dark hair glittered in the pale light and she snuggled closer, drifting into a light doze. He stayed with her overnight, watching the mix of emotions as she dreamt. When a nightmare came, he washed it away with soft purring growls.

Kagome woke hours after the sun had risen, and the fear still in her heart nearly caused her to scream. There was Sesshoumaru, holding her like the kid she still was inside, stroking her hair.

She quelled the fear as best she could, determined to forgive him his only flaw.

An uncomfortable pulling brought her attention to her person. A slight shift and she knew it was the pup. She swallowed nervously. Could it be growing so quickly? Sesshoumaru’s hand came to rest on her stomach and the discomfort stopped.

“Sesshoumaru… Um…” She blushed, feeling stupid for even having to ask. He seemed to understand either way. “Traditionally, three moon cycles.”

Three months?! Kagome looked down at her stomach in awe. Demons sure did grow fast.

She became aware of being hungry then, and told him as much. He stood, lifting her with him and carrying her off. She yelped, surprise in her look, and settled into his arms, hanging onto his shoulders. If he had been anyone else, Sesshoumaru would have smirked.

In the dinning hall, a large table made of a foreign wood took up the expanse of the room. Just like her room, it was big and wide enough to house Sesshoumaru is true form. He sat her at the far end, summoning a servant to bring the meal.

Kagome blushed. “I can feed myself.” She murmured softly. Sesshoumaru grunted in displeasure. “You are the Western Lady now, Kagome.” Was his reply.

Kagome decided to let this one lie. They were trying to find reasons to like each other, despite the pain between them. She didn’t want to ruin what little comfort they had together over something petty like servants.

Conversation was lost on them as she ate, the tension growing by the second. Finally, when they could nearly take it no more, in bounced a little girl with black hair and a checkered kimono. “Sesshoumaru-sama!” She shrieked, attaching herself to his leg. “Rin has missed you!”

Kagome grinned widely as he lent to pat her head, sitting her at the table where she chatted happily about everything she could think of. Any doubts Kagome had had about the truth behind Sesshoumaru’s story washed away in the face of the child. Surely an evil, rapist demon would not have a child who loved him so.

Minutes later Jaken came in, scolding Rin for running from him. Despite his scolding, he looked a little relieved. Does he worry about her? Kagome wondered.

When breakfast was finished, Rin took Kagome to the gardens. “These are Rin’s favorite.” The seven year old prattled. She handed Kagome a lily, smiling brightly. Pain and memory melted in the face of that smile, and Kagome returned it.

“Does Kagome-sama have a favorite flower?” The girl asked. “I really like white Chrysanthemums.” She replied. “And roses.”

Rin grinned brighter and ran to the far end of the garden, returning with the mentioned flowers. Kagome laughed and gave the girl a hug. “Can you show me where I can put these in water?” She asked. Rin frowned. “But Rin gave them to you.” She said.

“And I want to keep them, Rin-chan, but if I don’t put them in water they will wilt.” Rin nodded and led her back to the castle.

With the flowers now in water, the girls went to Rin’s room. The room was smaller by far than Kagome’s but still had ample room for a child to play. Rin led her to a door in the back, which led to an alcove all for the child.

There were daisies and lilacs, and lots of grass for the girl to run around. “Teach Rin.” The little girl said, plucking some flowers and handing them to Kagome.

With a knowing smirk she set Rin in her lap and began to show her what to do. Together they weaved four flower crowns before a servant came and ushered them to lunch. Sesshoumaru was occupied elsewhere, but Kagome knew he wasn’t far off. His presence said that he was out patrolling his lands.

He would petrol more often now, she knew, while she was with pup.

The rest of the day went by quickly with Kagome telling Rin all the stories of her childhood. Jaken watched over them both through the day and on into night, content to sit in the corner. When Rin yawned Kagome laughed and lifted her into her arms and Jaken led the way back to Rin’s room.

“It’s going to take me a while to get used to all this.” Kagome said softly, when the girl’s door was closed behind her. Jaken merely nodded knowingly and led her to her won room. “Sesshoumaru-sama will come to see you later.” He said softly, as though unwilling to startle her. Kagome nodded thankfully and headed for bed.

She was woken hours later by a sharp pain in her abdomen. At first she was unsure she had felt anything, until it ripped through her again. She cried out and tossed, finally curling into the fetal position. “Please stop.” She begged, tears brimming in her eyes.

Another bout of pain pulled a strangled scream from her and instantly Sesshoumaru was there, placing his clawed hand over the pain and rubbing in soothing motions until it stopped.

With painstaking slowness she reached forward and held onto him. “Why does it hurt?” She asked quietly. He sighed softly and drew her more firmly against himself. “You are human, and the pup is not.”

Kagome nodded wearily, burying her face in his shoulder. “Will the pain get worse?”

“Hai.”

Kagome bit her lip. “Is there anyway at all to stop it?”

“I have sent for a Healer to help.” He said, pushing her hair out of her face and nuzzling the top of her head. “You must not try to use your miko abilities, Kagome.” She nodded without questioning him.

Before sleep took her she whispered a phrase that gave him a spark of hope. “I forgive you, Sesshoumaru-kun.”