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Totality by S'revan

Apathy

Sesshoumaru in his own mind and the question of feelings. 150 words.

One: Apathy

The prison was of his own making.

He had made it deliberately. It was an advantage, after all, to be seemingly emotionless. It threw others – enemies and allies alike – off guard. Now that he thought about it, though, it felt like ages had passed since he had felt anything. Had he truly locked emotions away, or was he just so good at concealing them that they were hidden even from himself?

Surely this aching sense of emptiness wasn't the result of his lack of emotions. This gentle depression that made him think about more than the present wasn't because his contentedness was hidden. Or was he content?

Had he ever been happy? Not that he could recall. Of course, he had never been truly unhappy either, that he could remember, or even particularly angry. This mildness of feeling should be something to be proud of.

So why wasn't he proud?

~ end one ~

:: silently leaving everything behind – nothing left but me ::

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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