Interesting story but could stand a little more personalisation of the characters that you mentioned in the story such as who was the 'old man who gave her rice',for example? He seemed like he just appeared rather than introduced into the story albeit a minor role. Why would the crowd of people be cheering as the girl was wisked away?

I look forward to reading more and hopefully get a few explanations of each of the character's personalities.

Good start! *hugs and smiles*

please update soon. whith longer chaps please

Well the first chapter is very interesting. It peeked my interest. Especially we do not know the name of the girl or the name of the western lord. This makes the story a bit of a mystery and I look forward to reading more of your story.