Hey there, so I enjoyed the fic, or the concept of it anyway. I think you could do well as a write, but speaking constructively, there are a lot of things that needs improvements. Getting a beta should be number one for you, or at least type your story out on word and spell check it and grammar check it. You don't know the difference proper spelling and grammar could make. It's one of my irritants to see it used poorly and it's something that can make a fic, or break it. Now, the spelling in this fic is pretty good compared to some of the others of yours I have read, not perfect, but pretty good, but there is work that could be done on the grammar, and format.

I do like the idea though, usually it's Kag that's killed in the accident, not Sesshoumaru so it's got originality.

Now the one thing I'm going to ask you to do though is delete your author's note to the person you called a slut. Yes, their words were mean and shouldn't have been said, however, your response was uncalled for and whatever nice nice feelings I had from reading the fic (the emotion in it gets to me from time to time) they were completely destroyed when I saw your note. Best thing to do is ignore them. But you NEVER call anybody a slut. This person could technically sue you for defamation of character, as it's one of those strong words with negative connotations.

But really, it was just plain childish how you reacted, and very indicative of what I believe your age to be. Please do the mature thing, ignore what they say and take your reponse down, and apologize for calling them such a name. You can be angry at their words, but you need to apologize for calling them something like that. As much as I enjoyed this fic, let me assure you that until I see that it is taken down, and an apology for that name since what you wrote was 100 times worse than what he/she said to you, I will not read or recommend any of your fics to anybody else.

As it is, I'm checking out the rules and will probably go to Nile-sama or Winter with this because it's just plain inappropriate.

I thought something like this would happen. You almost totally contradicted yourself, you know that? You said so yourself that you're a loving person, and you're not completely angry. Then why such a big fuss calling me a slut? You also say that it's "overly pethetic"(It's pathetic, by the way) to leave a nasty review over the internet, but isn't it "overly pethetic" to leave a nasty reply as well? It's also very pathetic to get people to riot with you just because someone was sharing their opinion. Criticism is what makes someone write their story better, to prove that they can do better than the person giving the criticism. If you don't like it and are as sensible as you say you are, ignore and delete the review, and get the fuck on with your life.

P.S.: Don't post up another Author's Note complaining to me about how I "came back to flame" you. It's my job to scout out idiots who waste space on this site.

oh yeah if sess dies she can never make him beg for her to come back....and that'd suck.....
....I wonder if she had his kid.....I'm assuming they're all humans......
.......yeah kag could have a 2 year old rin...I mean Rin does look like Kags daughter doesn't she??

PLEASE CONTINUE AND MAKE SESS HAVE TO WORK FOR KAGOME!!!!

ohmygosh....it looks like you have a cyber stalker hun.....I loved your a/n to your biggest fan....I almost woke the house up reading it.....

he was trying Sango out to see if he really cared for Kag!?!? WTH???
if he had really cared for her that sob wouldn't have cheated on her....I mean he probably slept with enough girls in the past to know what he had with Kags was something real......

Okay, umm, have you considered getting a beta? It IS a good story (I didn't much care for the end, but that's my taste, not your problem) but many of the issues I think you should contend with could be easily remedied by a beta. Little things can really add up in a story. I like the idea, and how it all came around, but it's a story that needs special care. What I think I'm trying to say is keep writing, the idea is original and fresh, but in order to secure the most reviews, you should try to work out the few minor kinks. Please, e-mail me if I can be of any assistance. I'm an english major in college and would love to help!

Oh, and I loved the way you handled that one review! Nobody has the right to tell someone something like that, and they knew that b/c they didn't leave a proper name. Good luck with any future projects!

uhh.

i thought it was okay though i didnt like how u ended it. i get that Sessho is totally OOC but wow. he kinda seems like a wuss to me in this fanfiction.

i dunno. personally i wouldve liked it better if he was indifferent about it. but that my opinion. all in all, pretty good.

I thought that was horrible. It was too short, the story line was terrible, the dialogue between characters was even worse, and there wasn't even italics to indicate where the song was, and what Sesshomaru was saying. All in all, I think you should go fuck yourself before writing another story.

OMG I LOVED IT!!!!!! and i love you! but thats beside the piont! this story rocks but why did sesshy have to die?? i bet you did it for a reason the becasue you are so talented and stuff and beatiful even though i have never seen you i bet you are..anywaya loved the story and love you!

SarahhhBoo's Biggest Fan

nice, i love it !! T_T that makes me cry.........^^, can you make more? or even just um..........sequence?

it was good but y did Sesshy have 2 dieT.T I WANNA COOKIE ^_^ !!!!