Hmm.. You have a nice plot going on. But here are few suggestions what you could do to make it even better.

a) Find yourself a beta. You have quite much typos, and many of your sentences don't start with capital letter and so on.

b) Try to avoid some way too used plot twist, so that you don't use clichees. Some great writers are able to write clichees so that they became fresh and new once again, but it demands very much skill.

c)Describe things a bit more. I like how you told tha reader about the characters, but do that to the surroundings too. I also suggest you to get into the characters head and tell us what they are thinking. It's plausible to write a story by telling only the actions, but those kinds of stories can easily become boring. It adds some spice to the story to know the reasons behind the actions, you know?
d)When posting a chapter, especially to a site which allows you to use html languege yourself, always check that you didn't miss anything. For instance the first chapter of your story could use some checking...

e)This one is just my personal opinion. Please think twice before writing a dialogue to the end of the chapter using yourself and some of the characters. It was funny for a while, but now it has become a way too used idea...

Anyways. I think you will be a great writer. :P Think about the things I mentioned. I would definitely love to read some of your works in future.

~Dah-chan~

read chpt 3 as well!

Hmh, I think the blood oath was a good idea. Naraku being Shippo's foster father is a disturbing idea, to me at least O_o
But, I do think this was your best chapter this far ^^

Done with 2nd chappie.

Hmmh. 1, it seems unconvincing that Sesshy-boy would bond with his ward that fast. Nuh-uh, not gonna happen >_>
2, Also, if both attackers were knocked unconscious, would Sesshoumaru let thyem live? I highly doubt that.

Though, I know that killing Kags and Bankotsu off in second chapter wouldn't be too good for the story, buuut.. XD

Sorry ^^; My intention is not to flame you, but point out some parts where you could work a bit more to make it all better :)

Oh And Inuyasha popping out was a cool twist. :) claps for that

Hmmh. Read just the first chapter. The idea seems interesting, though not quite my usual choice to read >_>

Also, making BANKOTSU Kagome's twin disturbs me a bit >_> And I don't like it when people make Kags a youkai, but this is better than a sudden miracle changing process like there is in some fics.

Also, I found OOCness. >_> Try to work on that a bit and I'm sure this'll only get better ^_^

GAH!!!! I can't believe you left it off right there!!!! and just when it was getting good too!!! update soon kay?

ta!

Silk_worm

hi- love your story. It's actually very different from what I've read in other fics.......for perhaps the first time, kagome isn't the damsel in distress....ugh that can come out to be so predictable.

anyways please update soon, I look forward to reading your next chapter.....

ja!

Silk_worm

haha luv it!!!!!

Update soon....
~FFM~

hey i love it great job

hey i love it great job

I'm excited for the next chapter hope you update sonn!! Great start By the way! keep up the good work!

Those twins r definitely weird assasins. Y would they even be introducing themselves to their enemy? This fic is a bit unfocused and it doesn't have much logic in it. I hope that you fixed that by the time u update.